Pat Shingleton: "Some Crazy Schtuff..."
On this date in 1975, Jim Tollan, on the fourteenth hole of his local club in North Lincolnshire, nailed a mallard duck flying overhead. It fell onto the green in front of the Mallard Inn. “The Almanac of the Infamous, Incredible and Ignored,” reports that in 456 BC a Greek oracle warned that Aeschylus, the father of Greek drama, would “die by a blow from heaven.” After hearing the prediction, the battle hero and author of over seventy Greek tragedies stopped going outdoors during storms. On a sunny day in Gela, Sicily, a Lammergeyer vulture flew overhead with a tortoise in its claw. Believing Aeschylus’s bald head was a rock and with hopes of dropping it to open the shell, Aeschylus died. One final story and Thanksgiving...I was invited to my girlfriend’s home for Thanksgiving lunch years ago. Her Mom, informed me that I pronounced Houston – “eweston” and humid – “u-mid” and her grandson - "you" instead of Hewwwww... If all of us were transported to my Mom’s Thanksgiving table many years ago, an interpreter would have been summoned.. “You have something comin’ up,” means an item on your schedule or an upset stomach. “Reddin’ up” is straightening your room and just one table identifies past experiences at the breakfast, lunch or dinner table. “Am I in your road?” – is getting in someone’s way and “warsh” is wash - the nation’s capitol is “Warshington.” Thanksgiving dinner includes mashed “baa-tate-uz,” and the state west of Pennsylvania is “Oh-high-Ya.” While, smile, pile and towel are pronounced –“wow, smowel, pal and tile.” A “sweeper” is a vacuum and “push buggies” are grocery carts.
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